SISTER to SISTER

An embrace of her with both hands; however, one hand PATS YOUR BACK as the other STABS YOU IN THE BACK! Why?! This ought not be so!

Women, Sisters, Friends....we share the same hurts, anxieties, desires, excitements, and disappointments. Deal with the same man drama, children issues, life concerns....that makes us more alike than different. There are so many elements of womanhood which should bind us closer and foster sisterly support, but we refuse to embrace it.  We possess the ability to express compassion and should do so when another woman has experienced or is experiencing challenges that are familiar to women. Like Madear would say, "if you haven't experienced them yet, just keep on living."

God has placed intrinsic value and a special gift in EVERY ONE of us. We were fearfully and WONDERFULLY hand-crafted. What a marvelous creation is WOMAN! Our value does not have to look alike or simulate another woman's  value. Regardless of the unique variation, the value DOES NOT change. So why is it that we fail to embrace the internal, external beauty and strength of other women?  Why must we degrade another in order to elevate ourselves? Can we not love the skin that we are in and celebrate the skin of another?


It is very disheartening to continuously witness the back-stabbing, back-biting and bitterness among women. This emotional ugliness that is outwardly demonstrated is seemingly manifested through individual insecurities. What is even more heartbreaking, this negative behavior is reflective among those who claim to be the saints, honorable women of God. Is THAT the love God has commanded you to demonstrate one to another? "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another"~John 13:35~.

We fill the churches on every Wednesday night and Sunday morning, shouting, singing and dancing but leave gossiping, cursing and fussing. How quickly do we forget that we were just asking for help with our light bill, groceries or rent when we see another sister who appears to be "struggling" in life's circumstances. Why do we say that we will stand by you, pray with you, pray for you, call me IF ever and WHEN ever you need me, let me know if I can do anything....when in actuality, we do not pray with you, we forgot about your concerns because we were dealing with our own issues, we believe that our own needs required the attention and when the phone rings, we actually screen our calls and NOT ANSWER the phone?

Sister to Sister....Let's just keep it real. STOP LYING to yourself and other people. If you can not commit to it, then do not promise it. If you do not like it, then do not say that you do. If you do not want to, then do not say that you will. If you know that you are NOT being a REAL FRIEND, then do not EXPECT real friendship in return. If you know that you are a gossiper, then do not get upset when people begin to gossip about you. If she revealed to you a sensitive matter, she trusted you....do not violate that trust; she needs your prayers. STOP degrading her....if she makes or made a mistake, help her to do better by gently informing her. If she dresses inappropriately, why not buy her a pair of shoes and donate a new suit....people do better when they know better.

If you are rolling your eyes at every woman that comes in and goes from your presence, talking about their business, finding fault and the negative in all that she does, the truth is.....there isn't anything wrong with her....the real issue is YOU. It's time for self-examination of why you're so insecure and unhappy.

Now, we know that there exists a great multitude of women who are secure and maintain healthy friendships. The previous is not applicable to all of us but for those of us that this message applies....CONVICT & CORRECT or GET MAD & GET OVER IT. Deliverance is available to you.

~Lady Alana~